Secret Saturday: When Friends Aren’t Really Friends Anymore

People get busy.  Lives happen.  You have work.  You have adult responsibilities.  Sometimes you go a while without seeing or talking to some of your friends.  It happens.  You’ll make a quick mention that “we should totally catch up!”  so they know you haven’t forgotten about them, and usually a bit more time goes by, but then you get to connect again and all is well.  Especially with the “do more” mentality that seems to prevail, this kind of interaction is normal.  It’s not ideal, but I think we’re all in a place where we get it, we understand.

But you can cross the line from “normal” to “what a beyotch” relatively quickly.  It’s not hard to do, but it’s also super easy to avoid it.  Are you ready for this Earth-shattering revelation?  When one of your out-of-touch friends texts/calls/emails/Facebooks/in-any-way-communicates-with you even just to say “we should find time to get together/chat” and you don’t respond at all, even with “I’m sorry I really can’t talk right now, but I’ll get back to you soon”, you have reached that line.  With so many forms of communication available to us, there is no excuse to not respond in some manner.

Last weekend was the 1 year wedding anniversary of the man who served as our best man at our own wedding.  We couldn’t tell them congratulations, or anything really, because the groom has not had any contact with Geoff or any of the other groomsmen since the wedding.  Yep, completely radio silent.

It took all my will-power to not text “congrats on the one year anniversary of the last time you saw your friends!”

He has ignored texts, phone calls, emails, FB messages, anything you can think of, from all three groomsmen.  The only reason we know he is still alive is because he still shows up in the Facebook news feed.  I’m mildy irritated at the situation personally, but what really irks me is how this sucks for Geoff and the rest of the guys.  Whenever one of them brings up “so has anyone heard from J?” there’s a heavy sigh.  All we can say is we hope he is happy.

Maybe one day we’ll get to know.

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Posted on September 21, 2013, in Life, Relationships and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. This makes me sad to hear about. I’m irritated for Geoff and the guys too! I wonder what happened… I have a similar story. The last time I visited my parents, my maid of honor and I had a little misunderstanding which led to her refusing to talk to me for three straight months, despite the fact that I apologized, told her I missed her, etc. It was heartbreaking, especially because it is so easy to stay in touch these days. We’re sort of in contact now but it’s not the same, which is sad….

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