Secret Saturday: I Almost Didn’t Get To Go To Kindergarten
Of course I don’t remember what happened over the course of my kindergarten interview. I vaguely remember being in a room way to big to only have 2 people in it, which is really nerve-wracking when you’re 5 (what is with all the empty space?!). I also vaguely remember wrinkling my nose at Brenda on more than one occasion because she asked me a question that didn’t really make sense.
I do remember that I decided adults were strange.
When we were done, Brenda went out to talk to my mom about how well I did.
“She doesn’t know her alphabet,” she said, apparently with a bit of condescension in her voice.
My mom, of course, was shocked to hear this. Of course I knew the alphabet. I sang that stupid song day in and day out and about drove her mad. I didn’t just know it, I could write it. My mom protested, only to get this response:
“No, she doesn’t know her alphabet. She only knows upper case letters.”
Apparently this Brenda asked me if I knew the alphabet, and when I said yes, she told me to write it. So I did. Apparently “write the alphabet” does NOT mean to just, I don’t know, write the alphabet. What she meant was to write all the letters in both upper and lower case. I only wrote the upper case (why would a 5 year old think to write the letters twice?). When I was done she said “do you know the rest of it?”, to which I just looked at her funny, which she took as “no”. Of course I looked at her funny. I was a letter of the law girl. If she had simply said “do you know how to write the letters as lower case?” I could have scribbled those out. Instead, what I heard was “you didn’t write all of the alphabet, where’s the rest of it?” and I started going “no, the song ends there! There is no more!”
I also apparently didn’t do too well on the “where is this body part and what is it for?” quiz. She’d say random things like “eye” and “foot” and ask me to point to it and tell her what it was for. Apparently at the age of 5 I’m suppose to know exactly what a jaw is, and didn’t have a clue. After berating my mother for not teaching me where my jaw was, she shared this little gem:
When asked where my chin was, I immediately pointed to my chin (hey at least I got that one right). She asked me what it was for, to which I crinkled my nose, looked at her, and said “well, I don’t think it really does anything…I guess it’s just for decoration!”